You've gotta be proud to be a Malaysian... No. 1

You must be proud to be a Malaysian because we have no problem looking for a rubbish bin. Everywhere you'd be able to find a rubbish bin and better still, if you're Malaysian, literally everywhere is a place to dispose of your wastes!!

Scenario 1:

Just the other day, driving along some busy road. The car in front of mine, had it's front passenger side window wound down and out came a plastic bag. The sort you see people sell fruits in. Yup, just right there while the car was moving in the middle of the road. Thus, I told Jenny sitting beside me how civilized our Malaysian citizens are and how there care about the cleanliness of their beloved country. Before I could finish my comment, the window on the drivers side began to wind down and tadaa, another piece of crap was produced...

Scenario 2:

This happened quite a while back. Also whilst driving, but this time, a whole plastic bag full of what I assume is waste flew out from the back seat passenger window on to the side of the road. If I wasn't mistaken, the culprit was a child. So this how they are taught huh??

Well, I thought it's bad enough that people are not using the designated bins in certain places where they just throw things into the drain or the road side. But doing it from a moving car!!??!! Man, you've got to be proud to be a Malaysian. Furthermore, seeing as how this is being set as an example for our future generations, I just can't imagine how proud they'd be when their time comes...

Transfer

Another year is about to come (my working years I mean). By this September, I would have worked is this place for 2 years! Plenty have changed here, for the better of course. But still, I don't think I'd feel any regrets leaving this place. My application for transfer had already been sent and I double checked, it had reached the hands of the Human Resource department in JKNP. Now, fingers crossed, I just hope that Ms. Wee will allow me to transfer to Bentong Hospital. She, at least I could trust in helping me out. Unlike the comfortable arses sitting up at Bah. For 2 years had my appeals and applications been either turned down or worse still KIVed till no end. I guess this is the way to shoo away the 80% they estimated annually. Great job!!

Really really hoping hard to get to Bentong Hospital. At least let me have a half a civilisation than to none...

Shoutout!!!....

Sometimes I get questions like "Why do you keep everything to yourself? Why don't you tell it out? How are you going to expect people to understand you when you don't tell?" Well, the answer is just simple, it doesn't make a difference. No one will be interested enough in another's problems. Say you'd like to hear what I have to say. But then, do you really listen? Halfway through, you'd be too bored and will try to end things by giving unnecessary solutions. Then get annoyed if I don't take it into consideration.

If someone is willing to listen, they listen slowly. Not when they feel annoyed that you are keeping something to yourself. They'll listen to you actions and how you act. They'll pay attention and ask of your opinion before making any of their own assumptions as the best solutions. They not just say "Oh, you are just paranoid and impossible!" How does someone expect you to tell when they keep giving you such feedbacks? Then after that they'll blame you for not telling, for keeping things to yourself, for holding it in.

There is a limit to how much you can hold in before it's too much... Everyone is just too selfish to care about another's problems. They have their own problems too, but are not willing to put that aside when they are trying to listen. So that's why, "Why tell? No one's listening..."

TAMRON AF 18-270mm F/3.5-6.3 Dill VC

I recently just got a new lens. Actually after a looooonnnggg survey here and there. I wanted a longer telephoto lens and so have to surveying. At first, I was aiming for the Canon 18-200mm lens but it was a bit expensive, around RM2900. Then this new lens came in just at the right moment. The TAMRON 18-270mm and with a cheaper and more affordable price. Even then, it's still not cheap and I don't grow money on trees, so I continued surveying with my target set.

The first price I got was from a online shop and they quoted it for RM2590 and it's online. So I went lens hunting shop by shop and until last Saturday, David and I went to this place in Pertama complex and the salesperson, a super effective sales uncle in my opinion, gave me his best price of RM2250. Well, that's the story on how I got it then...

The new toy

The "tai phau"

The TAMRON 18-270mm is a really wide range telephoto lens. With wideangles at 18mm and zoom up to 270mm it gives me more convenience in a single lens. The picture quality is good too. Besides, this lens allow me to take 1:1 macro pictures and thus, it's perfect for an amateur like myself. Now, I can take the picture I've always wanted too... the moon...

With VC, a crucial technology for a telephoto lens

The only downside of this lens is that it's heavy (well, inevitable), the focus is slower than a Canon lens but for me it's still reasonable (maybe when I go into wildlife pictures I'll see the differences) and the focus is quite noisy.

But, now I can take this kinda pictures!!! Compare with the moon picture of the "Smiley in the sky" What a huge difference!!!

The Moon

Disease struck...

Another reason why working in the rural area in a tropical country is not much fun is that you are more exposed to diseases which are carried by insects. Regardless if it's those pesky mosquitoes or bed bugs or just anything that would most willingly sink they're teeth or whatever appendages they use into your body. You could try to get rid of them but well, it's the jungle, they grow faster than anything here.

Just this past Friday, I came down with the worst fever I've ever experienced. Start with chills and then followed by burning heat. When I went to the hospital on the Saturday, my temperature was 39.6 degrees Celsius. And this was after I taken 2 PCM. Still the doctors only did a blood test told me it was a viral fever and sent me home with more PCM. That night itself the fever was worse, so I paid another visit to the ER in the middle of the night. This time I was given an injection which miraculously cleared the fever. Whao, was I thankful. Even the next day was fever free. However, I had a sleepless night the whole night maybe due to the tea I drank in the evening. On Monday, I thought of going back to the hosp to extend my medical leave. During this time my condition turned bad yet again. Did another blood test and results came in my platelets were falling but still within range. So, I was asked to come back for another review on Wednesday. Monday night was another bad night, I had to wake and sponge myself the whole night. Only on Tuesday night did get some real sleep and the fever subsided. Came Wednesday morning, went back to the hosp and get my blood checked. Platelet levels already down to 117.

Now, I'm extremely exhausted, bored and my stomach is giving me problems. It's really one of the worst times I've ever been. Oh, and my mom's forcing me to drink juice from grounded papaya leaves *Eeeeuuuuuurrrrggggghhhhh* Disgusting!

K.L. view from the MRR2

Ever since I started working in KK Simpang Pelangai, I can't wait to come back every weekend and whenever I get the chance to. I use the MRR2 as it's the shortest possible way that leads to my home in P.J. Each time I pass this area near AMpang, I couldn't help notice the view of K.L. was spectacular there. Well, maybe I'm just too happy that I'm seeing the sign that I'm back in K.L. (now I understand why the twin tower and the K.L. tower is said to be a symbol to be proud of by every Malaysian. In my perspective, by every K.L.-ian or P.J.-ian cause it signifies that I'm finally home... ) Anyways, today, on my way back, I fine that the sunset was really beautiful as it hits the concrete jungle... So, I took out my camera and took a few shots... The shots were not taken properly because I was steering with my other hand. Besides, the road devider was really tall. Don't worry, I was in a jam when I took the pictures, so my car was moving extremely slowly. Otherwise, you think I'm daredevil enough to put other road users and myself in jepordy?

Scene blocked by railing on the divider...

Clearer view

Further down the road

Beautiful city view not for the divider

Sunset in the city...

Smiley in the sky

Taken with my EOS 450D, my new toy, is rare event. Two stars appearing above a crescent moon forming a smiley in the sky. On the night of the 1st of December, while I was making my dinner I got a call from my neighbour who went out attending to an on-call case. He asked me to come out and said that there's someone smiling above my roof. That kinda got me startled as I lived in the jungle and it's damn dark. Well, I went out to see what he was saying. After seeing what it was I ran in and took my camera to capture this and it took a few shots as my lens is only 18-55mm thus the insufficient zoom and I do not have a tripod. Anyhow, I didn't think much of this event until it came up on the news the next day saying it's a rare sighting. I guess it's a picture to remember then. : )

Another one rescued...

Today, I got to know that Mark, who spent more than a year in a district Hosp. in Malacca, got transfered back to K.L. Congratulations!!! from the bottom of my heart! It seems one by one, my colleagues sent to other far away states are getting back to civilisation. Well, previously when I get to know anyone getting back, I'd be surprised and anxious to know if my application got through. I'd call Jen, to discuss and this would usually follow with a call to the people in charge for a status check. Up till now it's been disappointment. "Oh it's still being KIV'ed for review in the next meeting" "May I know when's the next meeting?" "Oh, that we do not know, the bosses will have the next meeting when they wanna have the next meeting" "Oh, Great thanks a lot for such a vast amount of useful info"

Ahh... well, that was then, after a few of such scenario, hmm... not so hopeful anymore... another got back? well great news for you! Think maybe I should call tomorrow to bug them a bit. Expected answer? "Sorry, it's still being KIV'ed" "Oh, places in K.L. and Selangor are already filled" "Call again soon"... Felt like calling a distant relative... heard them all... nothing else to say... Well, that's life in the service...

Oh somthing interesting happened... I got a Canon 450D!! rocks!!! for a while... now i need new lenses!!!!!

What do I do these days???

It's been more than a year since I was posted into the jungle, to be precise, as of today, it's been a year and 19 days... and yet, with no sign of a transfer, I'm still stuck here. Yes, I'm counting the days. It's what desperate people do. The same reason why prisoners carve lines on the wall noting the pass of each day.

Well, what do I actually do here then? Nothing much actually. Nothing much can be done here anyways, since I'm so far away from friends and family, oh and most importantly, so far from civilization... Of course I'm exaggerating, they have schools here, estates, some food stalls, and ermm... well nothing interesting. So this past year, what I do daily has become, what they call it?... a routine... Not that I don't have much work to do. The workload here is enough to keep me occupy... for the day of course. So daily, I'll usually work till 6.30pm or 7.00pm. That is usually, when I have to manage my stock and do ordering. Sometimes, I'll be lazy and come back right after work.

Reaching home, I'll relax with some old mangas or animes (yup I'm thus pathetic). Then around 7 to 7.30pm, I'll start cooking. I don't think I enjoy cooking here as much as I did before. The environment is one thing, then there is the fatigue from work, the lack of ingredients and lastly, in the end I'll be only cooking for one... no need to make a big deal out of it.

Dinner will usually be accompanied by movies or series that Jen, my dear, so kindly provide or from wherever I could scavenge from. Then, I'll follow on with either the movie, or mangas, or now that I have connection, slow as it may be, surf the net until 10pm when I go collect water for my shower. Sometime before that I will have the joy of talking to my dear and then more after my shower till I finally go to bed at 11.30pm. It's these conversations that makes me feel not so lonely during such isolation.

The next morning I wake at 6.54am, with the aid of my alarm and a morning call from Jen and well... what did I say about a routine... That's me sitting my ass and growing by the inch, sideways that is, daily. I'm not even motivated enough to exercise... Sigh... Only sometimes will I go do something else like washing my car or so which now seems to take more effort than before...

Damn... I seriously need help

PS. I too noticed that my blogs turn sour when I started working with the 'you know who'... Better not say it or they might lock me up without trial...

It's durian season!!

It's been so long since I last posted anything here. Well, it's same old over here. Working in Pahang is really not a bad thing. Pahang for one is a beautiful state with most of it's natural beauty un-defiled. But, well, that's also another part which scared the shit out of me. What do you expect from a kid born and bred in a concrete jungle? Most fellow pharmacists I find working in this state regardless of how secluded they are, they seem to be giving their best in improving the image of the profession. It may well be due to well, us having a good TPK and also... Pahang is really a big state and there are only very few of us. So we may see each other more often and feed on each others positive thoughts as motivation to strive on.

Anyhow, it's durian season now in Pelangai!! and well, I've been having some myself. All thanks to the very very friendly "ah soh" from Mancis. She has been taking very good care of me. *sometimes up to a point where it scares the shit out of me too....* *Ahem...* As I was saying, she did bring me quite a number of fruits from around here; papaya which she claimed someone gave her but she cannot finish, durian which she claimed fall off the trees in her rubber estate, mangoes which she got from "who knows where" *I forgot what she said...*; all which she forced into my hands when I politely decline. Well, I was glad though, I got to taste plenty of good stuff. It kind of relieve me from the stress I get working here.

Oh, since I mentioned about work... for people who I once heard saying, "K.K. has nothing much to do wan... you are pretty much the boss there and it's quite free...", you really have NOT worked in a K.K. before haven't you?!?

petty thoughts...

It seems like history's repeating itself... and for that, I'm afraid. But if things are to happen, then it shall for I have no energy left to stop it...

I've got connection

At last!!!.. Praise the technology!! now everyone can go online regardless of where they are... Look at me!! ahahaha in the jungle and I'm online... well there are setbacks. First and most important, it's freaking slow. I took the 3.6Mb package and I've tested it... it's only running on 30kbps max d/l... WTF!! yes... sigh.. well i guess it's better than nothing.

They did promise at least 15x faster than dial-up. But I guess that only applies in the big towns. Must have written it off in some fine prints. Yet again, what more can I aspect? I'm in the middle of the freaking jungle!

I'm trying out Maxis Broadband now. I remembered the guy telling me, "if you have a full bar for your mobile phone, then you'll get EDGE connection which is faster than GPRS( the normal connection for all mobile phones)" Pffhtt... empty promises... can't blame him though... he's just selling. Never been here before, so I guess he wouldn't know that there are still places like this and still there are people settling here.

Well, as for myself, it's really very confusing emotions... happy cause i got connected, yet frustrated cause a page takes thousand years to load... Kinda remind me of my secondary years when the internet is something new...

Disappointment

In life, there are many hopes. And with hopes, comes disappointments as well. The amount of disappointments one must face in life is indeed too much to count. The disappointment of not getting the best things in life, disappointment of not getting to work where one likes, disappointment of not being able to please everyone, disappointment of not having enough time, disappointment of not having enough money, etc etc… and the list goes on. Disappointments like these, one can choose to get over with and get on with life, or, hang on to and have a miserable time.

However the disappointment that hurts most must be, I guess, having the person one cares about, love and trust most, not understanding what one is going through and thinks one as a disappointment oneself.

Sigh... Disappointment really causes extreme fatigue... *yawn*

Why'd they want me here in the first place?!!?

Urrghhh... it's just frustrating... first off, they do not pay for my tutor fee and study expenses, then they want me to work under them for 4 years. FINE!! I can adapt to that as well. Not a problem as long as I get my license when I'm done serving my time.

But that's not the end to it. Since I'm going to serve them, why can't they just put me in some place where I am happy with. Yes, they can't be pleasing everyone, but why the extreme?? THE OTHER FREAKING END OF THE WORLD??!!?? and they don't put the living expenses into consideration. People sent to work across the sea may get RM 800-900 extra and we get nuts. Worst off, I have to be specifically be post into a small district hospital which is freaking secluded and a place I don't think I can make many friends. Furthermore, my allowances have to be lower than those working in the city K.L. as the living expenses here SHOULD be lower. Don't they consider that we are already sent far from home and we have to use MONEY to pay for trips back home??!!?? They think we have no families to go back to??

Okay, besides being foreign to the place I work, they have to send me to a place where I cannot understand their language!! How the hell am I supposed to counsel any patients when all they do is look at my face??!!!?? Are they supposed to be suppressing my role after I've spent RM 200 thousand to get my freaking degree???!!?? Don't this state have their own people who took my course?? Why don't they want to come back?? Isn't it a problem that their own people do not want to come back??

Making work in a place I do not feel happy with, do they think it'll make me ever consider to stay in their service? Besides, the pace of the people here is really unbearable!!! How can so little things be done at such a long time?? How can the higher ups take their own sweet time and not fulfilling their role whilst making people under them do all their job?? Is this even fair?? They get paid higher than us, they can take leave and complaint when we do, they can not do things they don't like whilst asking us not to be selfish!! Whao!! what a great service I'm under!! By the way, how can they get so high when they can probably do nothing??

I'm getting demotivated daily and if this goes on, I think I might start to rot inside and become a pile of unmotivated ash. In my service where I'm supposed to learn from my higher ups, I'm now learning by myself and this applies to all my colleagues. Why?? because every question will go unanswered or they will brush you off with some vague answers!! Damn it!! Aren't they supposed to be professionals?? Vague answers for a person under training?? My my.. aren't they doing a good job producing a batch of new human resource??

Field work...

Last week I went to do enforcement field work in Machang. This is where I stayed. Have a look at Machang. This is how most parts of Kelantan look like.

Kelantan at dawn...

This is what I see every morning when I go to work....

The row I live in...

The street behind my row...

Yes, we do live in a city...

Summer?? here???

Urrghh... it's been a really torturing weekend... It's hot, there have been no sign of rain for the whole week, and the blood sucking critters are swarming everywhere. If it weren't for the repellant mats I switch on every night, I'd have sleepless nights, one, due to the freaking hot weather, and two, because I'd be a freaking buffet table. I wonder why mosquitoes just can't leave me alone. Is it because my blood is sweeter? My pheromones are more aromatic? I get no peace from these buggers....

What's happening to the world?... I don't remember Malaysia being able to achieve this kind of heat before??...

It's burning....

When did Malaysia got this hot???!!?? Did one year in Glasgow changed my perception in temperature?? Urrgghh.... *crazily fanning self* the dry spell had just only started and it's already this hot... What if we get in the middle of it? Man... a cold beer would be nice.... ice blended frappaccino... ice kacang... *drool*.... air-con in my room... *sweat*....

*O_o*.... *heatstroke + dehydration = loss of consciousness*

How's the dog going to do in the boar's year?

Came accross something amusing today in the papers. Know how the papers and other medias will get fortune tellers or 'feng shui sifu's to talk about how people born under each of the twelve zodiac animals are going to do in the new year? Well without fail, I saw one in the papers today. This column invited three masters to give their opinions and advises. Well, I then, of course, took notice of my birth animal, the dog.

Generally, all three masters commented that it's not going to be an easy year for the dogs. Hmm... why isn't this a surprise then?... It's been freaking long since I've heard dogs are going to have a well to do year. Sigh... I guess a dog's gotta live a dog's life then...

One master said that dogs will not do well in their business. Well then, that should be a problem for me now, since I'm don't even know how long will it take before I can start a business of my own. Besides, I am and will for at least three more years, feed of tax payers money. At least I'm not fretting about them collecting taxes in the meantime.

Then, dogs will have a problem in their relationship. Hmm... should I be worried about this one?... Currently I'm even having problems getting into one... *-_-"*

Another master said that dogs who are still single should do more charity work in order to meet their partners. This, I'm confused... Does it mean I'm going to get a partner through charity now then? Or my relationship will be some sort of charity from the so called partner??? *>_<*

The third then commented that dogs will feel tired and fatigue throughout the whole year. OMG!!! I'm always so tired and fatigue!!... Am I going to crawl to work the following year??? OR should I ask someone to drag me there then??!!!?? *LOL*

And finally, the highlight of the advises *drum roll*.... dogs should avoid visiting patients in the hospital... *O[]O"* does that mean I should quit my ^%$#@! job now then??!!!?? *ROTFLOL*

Professionalism...

"Stop bitching the profession!!"

It's bad enough that other professionals in the same field are looking down on us. Don't let the people to do the same!! Hold your profession with dignity and potray yourself as a professional.

How the hell are we to build confidence in others when we ourselves do not hold dear to our title?

You are old enough to speak your mind and thus, you are old enough to think and to make better judgement before making any decisions to act.

Remember, it is ourselves who can make others bow with respect. It is never 'their' fault that we are being looked down upon.